Modesty is Not a Dirty Word

I expect nothing good from secular culture. Minds closed to the things of Christ will never live according to biblical standards.

I expect a lot of good from the church. Minds enlightened by the Holy Spirit both can and should live according to what God desires. As with so many things, however, the church often disappoints. One particular area where this is the case is with modesty. In particular, I'm referring to modesty of dress.

How is it that just about any Christian who brings up modesty is almost immediately accused of being a legalist or a prude? One time I actually dared on social media (my mistake) to speak out against women wearing bikinis. I of course received a ton of push back along with the all too frequent question, "Do you expect women to wear burkas?" It is sad that any suggestion that men and women dress modestly is rejected by (it seems) the majority of believers.

Paul tells us in I Timothy chapter 2:

I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works (I Tim. 2:8-10).

The only explanation I have for this phenomenon - that of the church rejecting modesty of dress - is that the church has largely adopted the values of the world. This is not news; we've seen it all our lives. It is simply a very troubling thing.

A basic reading of the New Testament teaches us that followers of Christ will live far differently from the world. We will, in fact, be a peculiar people. Peter actually refers to us as aliens. When the body of Christ looks and acts like what it is (something unique), that pleases God. On the other hand, when the church looks and acts like secular culture something is very wrong.

Modesty of dress is not legalism. No one is calling upon Christian women to wear burkas. What I am calling for is the body of Christ living as what we are - a holy people. When it comes to dress, we should not be flaunting our physical bodies for the world to see. Rather, when we dress modestly it allows God to be glorified through what stands out - our acts of righteousness and service.

Please brothers and sisters, let's all embrace a lifestyle of modesty. When it comes specifically to dress, let's fault on the side of covering up as opposed to showing it off. There will certainly be some gray areas in this; we will not all agree, for example, what constitutes shorts that are too short. However, if we will strive to please Christ and embrace modesty we will look far different from the world around us. This pleases our Lord.

Interesting Thoughts on an Interesting Topic

I haven't given a great deal of thought to the issue of head coverings. However, when I have pondered it, I've assumed that the primary reason for it is modesty. Jeremy Gardiner proposes a different reason in the piece entitled Why Headcovering is not about Modesty. Regardless of where you stand on this issue, his short essay is worth the read. As for me, I don't really know what I currently think about head coverings. I'll have to ponder it some more.

Why Is Modesty a Dirty Word in the Church?

I'm sad to report that modesty is not a popular topic within the American church. In fact, it is so unpopular that it borders on scandalous. It has become what amounts to a dirty word. Why is this?

(This question comes from a prior post of mine entitled Sorry, But I Can't Stop Asking Questions.)

Modesty has become a dirty word because the church in general in this country has adopted cultural norms for almost everything. This includes dress. Additionally, we live in a culture that tells everyone, especially young people, to do whatever they want whenever they want. This is the most "me-first", individualistic culture in the history of the world. To challenge this line of thinking is to be labeled a bigot.

Another problem related to modesty is that it is often portrayed as a stereotype of what it is. Those who want to wear whatever, whenever often talk as if modest dress is the same thing as wearing a burka. This is absurd, but I've had people use this "argument" with me. When I've dared to suggest that Christian women should not wear bikinis, I have had people say to me, "What? Do you expect them to wear burkas?" I'm not joking.

Please let me be clear: modesty extends to more than dress, and it applies to both men and women. Modesty ought to impact, for example, the way we speak and the way we eat. Any aspect of our lives that is out of control is problematic.

What I've talked about so far in this post are actually symptoms. The most important thing is having a heart for God. Part of that is placing our own desires below His. We hope, over time, that our desires will in fact come in line with His. Those in the church who don't really care what God thinks have bigger problems than simply not wearing enough clothing.

In the end we must all ask ourselves whether or not we are willing to sacrifice our own desires for the betterment of others. In our me-first culture this is not a popular thing. In the largely me-first church this is also not a popular thing. However, if we are willing to seek God's desires and look out for the good of our brothers and sisters in Christ, then we will live modest lifestyles. While this certainly includes how we dress, it extends to much more than that.

Let's be modest in all areas of life. One exception: let's be liberal in how much we love God and our neighbors.

Why I Wear a Shirt at the Lake

This week our family is relaxing at my uncle's cabin at Seneca Lake in central New York State. The best parts of being at the lake are swimming in the water and hanging out on the dock. As long as the weather cooperates, we spend the majority of the time outside.

I wear a shirt whenever I'm outside. While almost all men in this situation take off their shirts, I keep mine on. This flies in the face of what is considered normal, but it's something I realized that I need to do.

A few years ago I posted something on Facebook about not thinking that Christian women should wear bikinis (I still believe this). I received wide-ranging responses. Some FB friends were thrilled that I would speak up for modesty. Others told me that I was being legalistic. However, one response stuck with me. One woman asked me whether or not I took my shirt off when going in a pool or going to the beach. I said I did. She then told me that I was being inconsistent.

At first I rejected her assertion. The more I thought about it, the more I came to agree with her. I was being inconsistent. How could I say that women should refrain from wearing bikinis when I myself took my shirt off in public? I realize that the two are not exactly the same, but there is quite a bit of similarity. My claim that women should avoid bikinis is based on the idea that it can cause males to stumble into the sin of lust. The lady on Facebook said that shirtless males cause the same problem for women. I had never pondered this before. Instead of thinking all the way through the issue, I had simply bought into cultural norms for what males should wear.

In order to be consistent I decided to begin wearing shirts when I used to take them off in public. I don't foist this idea on anyone else, but I'm glad to be consistent.

I wonder how many other places in life I'm still inconsistent. Probably quite a few.

Have you noticed any places in your life where inconsistency was pointed out? What did you do?

Bikinis Part Deux

Last week I asked a couple of questions related to modesty and swimwear. Specifically, I asked the following of Christian women who wear bikinis:

1. Why do you feel comfortable wearing a bikini to the pool or beach when you would feel uncomfortable wearing only a bra and panties in public?

2. Why is is appropriate for you to wear a bikini to the pool or beach when it would not be appropriate to wear only a bra and panties in public?

My purpose in that post was to hear from Christian women about their rationale for wearing clothing that shows off 90% or so of their bodies to public view. My intent was not to slam anybody, but rather to generate conversation. This is a topic that genuinely confounds me. I simply cannot understand how modesty and bikinis go together.

Alas, no Christian women who wear bikinis answered the questions. A few of you broke the rules (you know who you are) by commenting even though you are not Christian women who wear bikinis. Thanks for your interest.

Now I'm going to give the rest of you an opportunity to weigh in on this issue. Anyone is free to answer; you will no longer be labeled a "rule breaker." Of course, I'd prefer to hear from Christian ladies who wear bikinis because it is their reasoning that I'm trying to understand.

Is their lack of responding/commenting due to some sort of shame? Is it because they don't read this blog? Is it because they feel like they will be chastised? I have no idea.

Anyway, feel free to chime in. Let's see where the conversation goes.

Two Related Questions About Bikinis for Christian Women Who Wear Bikinis

First the questions:

1. Why do you feel comfortable wearing a bikini to the pool or beach when you would feel uncomfortable wearing only a bra and panties in public?

2. Why is is appropriate for you to wear a bikini to the pool or beach when it would not be appropriate to wear only a bra and panties in public?

I've made my position on bikinis clear here, so I won't revisit that now. My purpose in asking these two related questions is to (I hope) receive a coherent, reasoned response. I've never heard one before, but I hope to in the comments.

A few things about the questions:

First, I'd like to receive answers from Christian women who wear bikinis. If you are not a woman, not a Christian, and/or do not wear bikinis, then please do not comment. I'll give the rest of you an opportunity to answer next week.

Second, when I use the term "bikini," I'm referring to a two piece swimsuit that shows as much skin as a bra and panties. For clarification, I'm not referring to two piece suits that cover more skin such as tankinis.

Third, the issue I'm addressing is one of modesty, not location. In other words, I'm not asking why you would wear a bikini to the pool but not to work or church. Keep that in mind as you respond. Thanks.

Fourth, I won't chastise you for your response even if I disagree with you. I'll probably ask you a question, but I'll be charitable.

I have no idea who reads this blog. Therefore, I don't know if any Christian women who wear bikinis read it. Because of that, I may not receive many responses at all. In light of that, if you are a reader of this blog (and you are if you've gotten this far) and you know Christian women who wear bikinis, please ask them to respond. I'd really like to know the reasoning behind it.

As I said, I'll revisit these same questions next week to give all of you (who are not Christian women who wear bikinis) a chance to comment.

Bikinis?

God calls His children to lives of holiness. This takes on many forms, one of them being the physical aspect of life. God has given us physical bodies to bring Him glory. Part of modesty involves covering much/some of the body from public view. There is certainly room for disagreement among Christians over exactly what this means. However, I'm always stunned when I hear how strongly some Christian men and women defend the "right" of Christian women to wear bikinis. I cannot understand it. In light of this topic, I found the following video interesting:

What do you think?

Random Thoughts for 10/13/10

These are some short, somewhat random (at least in order) thoughts that have been bouncing around in my head.

-Christians should be the nicest people in the world. That may not seem too deep theologically speaking, but it is true. I wonder why this so often is not the case.

-Job Fairs are good for making you humble. I attended one yesterday here in Savannah. I saw many people, including me, all hoping to land what amounted to jobs that weren't that attractive. I'm glad God is sovereign because if I have to rely on my own skills and abilities to get a job, I could be unemployed for quite a while. That could be part of God's plan, but if it is I know He will provide.

-I'm a sports fan. That's one of the reasons we got rid of our T.V. - so I wouldn't watch so much. Last night, via the internet, I saw something very thoughtful happen after the Texas Rangers defeated the Tampa Bay Rays to advance to the ALCS. Since one of their players struggles with alcoholism, the team decided to use Ginger Ale for their celebration instead of champagne. I realize that the whole thing of spraying one another with liquid is pointless, but it was nice to see a team alter what it normally does for the good of a teammate.

-This past Saturday we experienced a very small example of the Lord giving and the Lord taking away. We received an e-mail from a friend offering a Guinea Pig for free. We decided to accept the offer. This was a blessing to our daughter Mary who really wanted a pet she could play with. We had a Russian Dwarf Hamster, but it couldn't do much more than run in its wheel. It was not cuddly. Well, just before the Guinea Pig arrived at our house, we realized that the Dwarf Hamster wasn't moving. Simply put: it died. We buried it, and a little while later the Guinea Pig arrived. I think of it as an upgrade. We do see, however, that the Lord both gives and takes according to His perfect timing.

-If you suggest on Facebook - as I recently did - that Christian women should not wear bikinis and Christian men should not enjoy women wearing bikinis, watch out! While some people will heartily agree with what you have written, others will beat you up with "Christian liberty" and "Judge not lest ye be judged." Modesty has certainly become a thing of the past in most sectors of our society, including much of the church.

-In thinking through the issue of creation and Genesis chapters 1-2, it bothers me that the creationism issue has been framed by many as a "culture war" issue. I think it is actually bigger than that. I believe it is an issue of biblical interpretation itself. If we say that Genesis chapters 1-2 should not be taken literally (and I realize there is a little wiggle room in what this means), then where do we stop with this method of interpretation? A fair reading of the text suggests that God's actions are explained literally to us. If we reject this, what else do we reject? How far do we go in this? I believe it is impossible to reject a literal interpretation of Genesis 1-2 and then turn around and accept a literal interpretation of other key truths of the bible like the resurrection of Jesus. And if there is no resurrection, there is no salvation. We must be consistent in how we interpret scripture.

-Regarding simple church/house church life, one of the primary reasons I hear people reject the concept is that these same people "have seen it and it doesn't work." I've read and heard many variations on this same thing. Basically it boils down to the fact that these people have in their own experience seen house churches that have not worked (usually blown apart or fallen into false teaching). Therefore, they conclude, house churches cannot work in our culture and should not be trusted or attempted. This reasoning is problematic for one main reason: it doesn't involve the bible at all. The biblical model shows house churches. Do they have problems? Of course they do - they're made up of people. However, this remains the model. Therefore we should at least accept the idea of house churches existing. We must let scripture inform and lead our decision making instead of our own experiences.

-Yesterday I had a wonderful two-hour conversation with a friend of mine. He is heavily involved in institutional church ministry, but he is also open to simple church ideas. We don't agree on everything, but it was refreshing because he is willing to ask hard questions about the Christian life, including the church, and also try to find the answers. We are in agreement that the American church is in a desperate crisis of discipleship. We had a good time talking about ways to combat this problem. We certainly don't have all the answers.

-If you attend a Southern Baptist seminary, you will in general receive an excellent education. The best part will be your original language classes and your theology classes. The most disappointing classes will be those that mention the church but don't really deal with what the bible says about it. Regardless, if you plan to attend, go here.

-We are in a dangerous spot if we automatically avoid books that have been given a certain label by others. One of these labels is "emergent." For example, I've been told to avoid certain books "because they are emergent literature." The problem is that the word emergent has come to mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people. My point is simply this: let's let the book stand on its own merits and not be afraid to read it just because of a subjective label someone else has given it.

-I just received this book in the mail. I'm looking forward to taking a while to read it (over 500 pages).

-Read this excellent post about how to write about those with whom you disagree.