Monday, May 2, 2016

I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

U2 is one of my favorite bands. I enjoy almost all of their songs, from the oldest to the most recent. One of my favorites is entitled, "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For."

Not only is it a good song, but the title also describes exactly where I am when it comes to the church. I know what I'm looking for, but I haven't found it. My hope is to gather in community with other followers of Jesus Christ who live simply and radically for our Lord. My desire is to follow the model for the body of Christ that God has given us in scripture. Let me be clear: I'm not searching for perfection. Rather, I just hope to someday be able to grow close to other believers who acknowledge God's plan for His church that He has provided in the bible.

For now my wife and I get together weekly with a few other folks. It is nice, but it's not what I'm hoping to find. I realize that part of the problem may be me. I'm more than willing to change if someone can convince me through scripture that my thoughts about the body of Christ are incorrect. Until that time, I'm going to keep looking.

What about you? Have you found what you're looking for?


Aussie John said...


Maybe you already have what God wants for you?

Eric said...


Good to hear from you. I hope you are well.

What you suggest here may be the case. It is difficult to know. However, the good thing is that we at least have a few people to gather with in a simple manner. Even though small, we can still carry out the one-anothers. For this I am grateful.

Paul G said...

A statement like, "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For." suggests that he or she hasn't come to know the only true and living God Jesus Christ, they are still searching.
I think that every man or woman who has come to the Lord Jesus Christ has found and does not look any further.

Peter Horvatin said...


I feel for you. I still haven't found what God has in store for me as to home church. I do meet with other believers off and on. I'm glad to hear that you have people that are of like minds who you can meet with as well as your wife seeing things the same way. You are an encouragement to me.


Eric said...


I appreciate your taking the time to comment. On this blog I've written for quite some time about my journey as it relates to the church. I've never called into question my faith in Christ. This post follows many others that detail the struggle to find real community in this country with its institutionally dominated church life. This post was short but I believe clear: I haven't found church life as it is described in scripture.

Eric said...


Thanks for your kind words. What a struggle it is to simply find what the bible describes for us.

The sad state of the church in this country shows the power of the institutional stranglehold. My guess is that pursuing God's plan for His body is often a walk in the wilderness.

Paul G said...

Thanks Eric, you said, "I haven't found church life as it is described in scripture."

I think that every man of God has the same problem, perhaps that is, we are looking to the traditional churches and not to the biblical Church, we expect to find church life in a traditional church.
The biblical Church is the small flock where two or three or more are gathered in Jesus Name.
It is there where the Lord Jesus Christ is working mightily among the Saints.
It is there where every member of His body are functioning according to their gifting in Christ Jesus our Lord.
It is there where the people of the Lord are corrected and are built up in the most holy faith.
Or plainly, it is there where the Lord Jesus Christ commands a blessing to the unity of the brethren.

Norm M. said...


I too, share your sense of dissatisfaction. On the other hand, I think that there is tremendous power and value in the fellowship that you currently have with other believers--even if it isn't readily apparent. Might this be the beginning stages of a long race?

T Aagard said...

I don't think God has asked us to look for church life by His design. He has called us to build it. We are "living stones" being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. Our instructions are to build what God has instructed, not just look for it. "... when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love."

God is connecting me to believers in various ways, though not yet any who are committed to organic "one another" focused building. I am connected to brothers in Bible Study Fellowship, which is a good start in the right direction beyond the spectating of pulpit facing gatherings. I connect with believers in my business for fellowship. I am developing a vision for a prophetic work among institutionalized believers into any church God directs me. I am currently focusing on a fellowship that believes leadership should not be paid. They still have a pulpit and pew setup where usually the 3 elders speak and a few others give a testimony for 4 minutes max. They are outside the box of professionalized ministry but are still tangled in authoritative elders controlling the flock for fear of something bad happening. I know believers in many churches in the area due to relationships in various ways when my boys were in a christian high school that made yearly trips to Mexico to build houses. As God directs I will visit there trusting for him to connect me to the right people who are willing to question tradition.

Perhaps we are part of your fellowship that you are building on the web. You have gone far beyond merely looking for church on this blog. You are a builder setting an excellent example.

Eric said...


That may be. It is a struggle to be content but at the same time looking for what may be ahead. One thing is for certain, this wandering makes me depend on Christ. I know you experience the same thing.

Eric said...


Thanks for your kind words. I hope this blog is helpful to all involved. So many believers are looking for something more than what the institution offers. The irony is that the institution is very busy and expensive but amounts to little. I'm looking for something much more profound - real community in the Lord. It is a rare thing, but I'm not going to stop striving, hoping, and praying.